remember when we were kids and we used to all sing that demented version of the barney song where it was like “i hate you you hate me let’s go out and kill barney”
i don’t remember ever doing this. you were a fucked up kid
i hate you
you hate me
let’s go out an kill barney
with a baseball bat
and a 4x4
NO MORE PURPLE DINOSAUR
if you ever call me annoying, even if it’s just jokingly, the chances of me ever speaking to you again are slim to none because I’ll be so afraid that every little word or sound that comes out of my mouth will aggravate you and make you cringe and hate my existence
"ARE WE REALLY HITTING ON EACH OTHER RIGHT NOW OR ARE WE KIDDING?!!" The Musical.
Jack needs his Hiccup.
“Mom, Jack won’t stop whining,” Mary called from the backseat of the car. She nudged her older brother who had taken up most of the room to drape himself over his seat in a dramatic fashion. He was upset because he had to be away from his loving, completely adorable boyfriend for the whole summer.
Anna twisted around in her seat to look at Jack. “Oh, Jack, it’s only for the summer. You’ll see Hiccup the day we get back I’m sure.”
“Why do we have to leave for the whole summer,” he groaned. “Why not for a month or even just a week.” He peeked at his phone. Hiccup was probably still asleep since they did leave at an ungodly hour to make it to Canada. “Besides, I thought Dad said he didn’t like staying at Grandpa North’s.”
Now his mom’s attention was turned to her husband who was trying to hide in his seat. “Oh, really now?”
“It’s not that I hate the guy,” Aster said, “he’s just… different.” He glared into the rearview mirror at Jack. “Besides, he’s family so we’re going to behave no matter what for the whole time we’re there.”
Jack wanted to point out he wasn’t really related, just adopted, but decided to keep his mouth shut. He continued to wallow in self-pity, looking at his phone and wishing for Hiccup to text him before they reached Canada. They had held each other and kissed the night before he had to leave. He already missed those round freckled cheeks, his big green eyes, his little pout. Jack made a strangled noise and buried his face into sweater sleeve.
The car ride continued with light music filling the silence and Anna pestering Aster about her father. Jack tried to get comfortable and suddenly hiccupped. Mary laughed at him as he continued to hiccup, sitting up straight to see if it would help stop them. He hiccupped once more and his eyes welled. Hiccup…
Mary hurried to grab her mom’s arm. “Mom, Jack’s crying.”